It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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