Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
