You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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