thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
