He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
