My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
