We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
