imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
God, I missed his penis.
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