they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
