Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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