My room smells like vodka and shame
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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