How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
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