This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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