HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
