i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Randomize
