Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
