Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize