i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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