Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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