I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize