i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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