He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Randomize
