Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize