What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I lost the right to judge tonight
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
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