you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
