her vagine was all disorganized.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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