Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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