The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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