The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
