nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
