I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
