ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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