We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize