I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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