She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It was confusing and full of hummus
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
not ubering you a puppy
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
