so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
