this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
