Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
