forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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