Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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