apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
