He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize