Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize