just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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