Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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