so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
