i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
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