DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
