I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
