Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
