You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
